Why do guitarists prefer tube amplifiers?

Because they’re biased!

Why didn’t the bicycle want to get up?

It was two-tired!

What’s brown and slippery?

Dirty ice!

Where do worms play baseball?

Wiggly Field!

Why did the kooky kid put bananas on his feet?

To wear slippers!

What’s a lion’s favorite flavor of ice cream?

Rocky Roar!

Why did the tree wish it was a computer programmer?

Because its bark was worse than its byte!

Why didn’t the rabbit like the comb?

Because it teased hares!

Why did the tropical bird want to marry a circle of fire?

Because it was a hot Flaming O!

Why did the robot learn to dance?

So it could have salsa with its chips!

Why did the koala buy gardening gloves?

So it didn’t have to pull up weeds with its bear hands!

Why did the cheddar cheese give up its singing career?

It was always sharp!

Why did the lunatic get a lobotomy?

For piece of mind!

Where does the Wolfman hide his spare key?

Under a howl-ow rock!

Why didn’t the fly make a buzzing sound as it flew?

It was a hoarse fly!

Why couldn’t the Mummy read the hieroglyphs?

Because they were en-crypt-ed!

Why didn’t the elephants go skinny-dipping?

Because they couldn’t remove their trunks!

Why didn’t the jury find the defendant guilty at the end of the day?

It was acquitting time!

Why did the customer at the diner send the stew back?

It was chili!